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Andy Newman

Full name: Andy Newman
Nickname: Grunter
Home Town: Romford, Essex, UK
Current age: 27
Major teams: TAB, Sway Cricket Club, Taita 2B Red
Batting style: Right-hand bat
Bowling style: Right-arm medium-slow
Cricketing Hero: The batting of Peter Such and the bowling of Graham Gooch
Song that fires him up: Kill All Hippies - Primal Scream

Mat Runs Balls RPB 6s Ave Outs +25
Indoor 53 654 667 0.98 1 21.80 30 0
Mat Inn NO HS Runs Ave Ccs +50
Outdoor 29 30 6 33 165 6.88 9 0
Mat Ovs Runs Wkts ROs RPB Ave SR -Conc 5w
Indoor 53 115 694 89 35 0.86 7.80 9.04 6 1
Mat Ovs Mds Runs Wkts Ave SR ER Best 5w
Outdoor 29 33.3 4 132 9 14.67 22.20 3.96 5-49 1

It was dimly lit, mildew sprouted out in blooms over the walls. The window sills were coated in the type of grime that even Mr. Muscle would struggle to overcome. It was easy to see why the lighting in the room was so poor. The room was vast, yet empty. A black and white tv sat forelornly in a corner next to the window. The TV provided the only means of illumination for the room. A man sat huddled up next to the television, a month old growth of hair erupting from his chin. Despite this Dickensian image, the most disturbing thing of all, the thing which would make you worry about this poor chaps sanity...? He was watching twenty year old episodes of Knightmare on endless loop.


Adrian Rollins stepped into the Isle of Man development office at Lords Cricket Ground, not sure what he was going to find. He wanted answers, and unmistakably, he'd found some. THe scorch marks he'd seen on the ceiling of the Lords museum were definitely due to the ceiling having been removed by acetylene torch, and then replaced using the same method. This was abudantly clear thanks to the acetylene torch having been left in the office, along with some blueprints with the accompanying legend, 'cut ceiling with a-torch here'. Rollins became aware that his brother must have stepped into something big; something which cost him his life. That much was certain. What wasn't so clear, was what this had to do with Paul Grayson, and why this hole had been cut in the ceiling in the first place. Rollins scouted the room for clues, before examining the acetylene torch in detail. The torch bore an inscription of the 'Hoxton Photocopier and Facsimile Serving Office'. After stealing a post-it note and pen from the adjoining office and noting down the address, he headed off to catch the tube to Dalston, and start the short walk to Hoxton.


Meanwhile, in central Asia; Peter Such, Mark Illot, Alan Wells and Gavin Hamilton were continuing to drift downstream on their little commandeered boat. Wells and Hamilton eyed each other suspiciously.

"Someone must have ratted us out!!" exclaimed Wells frenetically, "There's no way anyone could have known we were in that building"

"I don't know why you're looking at me, Alan" stated Hamilton firmly, "This hasn't got anything to do with me, and I guess we can rule out Lathers as well. What I want to know, is where has John got to?"

Suddenly, Illot piped up, "Oh, you can't worry about John, he told me he was going down the local cashpoint to get some money out to get us burgers!"

Wells and Hamilton quickly turned to Illot and stared at him angrily.

"He told you WHAT?!?!?" shouted Hamilton

"He was going to get us burgers"

"NO! Before that!"

"Oh, he was going to the cashpoint, you know, to get some money"

Hamilton thumped Illot in the face, before being restrained by Wells, "We're in the middle of a f*****g war zone you idiot! You can't just pop out for a bit of cash, maybe go and have a little flutter on the gee-gees and a read of Cosmo! Why the hell didn't you tell us!!"

Illot looked at Hamilton forelornly, rubbing his already swelling chin. Such put his arm around him to reassure him and told Hamilton that there's no way that Illot could have known that anything suspicious was going on. Still, regardless, it would seem as if they'd been betrayed. But the question was, why hadn't Stephenson taken the opportunity to relieve Such of the Ashes and return them to his employers?

Andrew Newman August 2007